The Blue Board

Check the strippers G-string.

Check your boots

But that's not where I hide my money FYI

Invite a woman over. Tell her you hid some money. She will find it in 10 minutes tops.

Good advice

I don't need to get drunk to lose stuff now.

Marijuana? How does that work?

Not a bad idea though, just make sure you nab a dog that searches for cocaine. There is residue of it on about 90% of US currency...

I dunno... I just read it in a report. 84% of all money you carry in your pocket now days has drug residue on it. THC is one of the residues found. I imagine others are as well.

I don't remember....

You probably just drunk deposited it in the bank. If I had a nickel for every time I did that.....

He may have even used it to drunk open a savings account.

Cigar box, any drawer you may have. Washing machine

I once hid my wallet in my dogs kennel because I drunkenly believed that no one would believe that a dog would have a wallet

Probably drunk opened an Etrade account